Warning: To any male reader, I may lose you after this. Fellow females, this post’s content may contain material that will have you cringing in imaginary pain.
I have two things to explain to you today.
Firstly, The Sidekick ditched the overalls today. She went bare-legged to work.
I mean, she had shorts on. I’m not suggesting she went to work in, well, nothing. What I am suggesting is she had no fabric covering for ALL of her legs so that half her legs were bare, not that she went to work without shorts…
I am now going to move on.
She was wearing shorts. Period.
She was wearing shorts because it’s been hot. In winter. Two weeks ago I gave up the battle between whether to possibly freeze or definately sweat, and ditched my own overalls.
Hot weather in winter. It only happens in Australia.
Today it wasn’t hot. It was downright chilly. So there we were, the Sidekick and me, shivering, and sniveling, and trying to hold our paint brushes steady. The bottom line is Ali regretted the overall ditching incident, and we spent the day telling each other how cold we were.
The second thing you have to understand is what an epilator is.
An epilator is a wonderful hair-pulling gadgets which basically…. pulls out hair. It’s a rather painfully alternative to shaving one’s legs, but for those who aborre shaving EVERY SECOND DAY CRYING ALL NIGHT, it’s an alternative you might decide to look into.
A few years ago, Ali the Sidekick, converted me.
Because I’m essentially a lazy person.
Because I hate shaving daily.
And evidently I’m one of those crazies who takes the alternative and screams, ‘You and me, Epilator! Bring on the pain, babe!’
The problem with using an epilator is it essentially makes you more lazy than you already are. You end up procrastinating until a lot of leg hair has grown back, and then you end up yelling for your mummy because the epilator exacts its revenge on you in a very revengeful way.
The answer’s too painful.
So. Have you got all that? Do you understand that Ali the Sidekick went to work in shorts and that we are both lazy procrastinating users of the ingenius painful, hair-pulling epilator?
Because what I really wanted to share with you is what Ali the Sidekick said when she came home and stood shivering in our kitchen with her hairy legs.
‘I’m so cold. Man, I wish it was so cold so I could say my leg hairs dropped off.’
Tradies. What would you do without us?
May it never be so cold your leg hairs drop off,
xx The Girl in Trousers