I have an introduction to make.
This is Ali.
I’ve dubbed her my sidekick.
If you haven’t guess by the overalls and paint brush, she’s working with the Boss and me.
Since I know my sidekick fairly well, I thought I’d give you some inside info on things you should know about Ali.
I’ve made a list. It’s called…
Things You Should Know About Ali
1. Ali’s wanted to be a tradie longer than I have.
Back when we were in school. Back when I had no interest in being a tradie. I thought she was a bit strange for wanting to be one.
Now look who’s talking.
2. Ali eats kiwi fruit with the skin on.
You know that brown furry skin that makes your tongue sore and stingy?
She eats that.
3. She laughs at my lame jokes.
Even when they’re so lame a hyena on laughing gas wouldn’t laugh at them.
This is the real reason I keep her as my friend.
4. Ali can throw a ball better than me.
She can play touch football better than me.
She can play basket ball, tennis, netball and beach volley ball better than me.
In fact, picture anything with the word ‘sport’ attached to it and you’d be 100% right in guessing Ali’s better at it than I.
I’m the kind of girl who plays soccer with my hands.
5. She likes to poke me in the side.
Even though she knows I HATE being poked. In fact, I’d welcome death rather than let anyone tickle me.
Whenever she pokes me, I tell her to quit it otherwise I’ll ninja karate her into next Thursday.
She pokes anyway.
I really need to work on my angry ninja face.
6. She’s a good listener.
This is a very good thing since I can talk a lot.
I try to be a good listener too.
Mostly, I end up finishing her sentences for her.
7. She’s honest.
When I mentioned, in mild shock, how I seem to blog A LOT about my little brother without really realizing it, and how I should probably try to vary my blog content a little more…
She smiled and said, ‘Yes, you should.’
It’s good having an honest friend around. They keep you humble.
8. She likes music from the twentieth century.
The Boss is officially out numbered and out gunned.
I’m thinking of staging a jukebox takeover.
The Boss and his classical music won’t know what hit them.
9. Ali can leg pinch like nobody I know.
There’s just something about her and pain. She knows exactly where your leg nerves are, (just above the knee, on either side of your knee cap) and if you’re around her when she gets the urge to leg pinch you…
Well, let’s just say I hate being leg pinched almost as much as I hate being tickled.
I tell her I have a mean right hook so she better quit trying to pinch me.
She does anyway.
This is why I need to get my angry face working properly.
10. Now that I’ve got all that out of the way…
I’ve known Ali since I was fourteen. We make each other laugh.
Sometimes we laugh about absolutely nothing.
Sometimes we laugh so much we cry and can’t breath and have to stop because our ab muscles can’t take the pain.
Back when we were fourteen we both had bad haircuts, freckles and skinny legs. Hers freckles were red, mine were brown. Her hair was stringy-ranger style and mine was brown mop-head.
Today, our freckles have fade somewhat, my legs stopped being skinny, and during the process of growing up, we acquired some hair etiquette.
For the next few weeks we’ll be rising with the rooster, high hooing it off to the same job site, and falling face first into bed at 7 p.m.
I predict ab hurting laughter.
And twentieth century music.
And weird eating habits.
But the one thing I know for certain…
I’m buying some knee pads.
xx Trouser Girl